First of all, my apologies for my complete and utter break down a couple of weeks ago. Apparently it's against blogger "Code" (wink, wink) to go out like that. I was going to make up a complete lie and tell you I was just completely exhausted from chronic stress followed by a three day migraine, but I care too much about all of you to make up some crazy story.
The truth is I was off smoking crack, it all started innocently enough. I was hanging out with a blogging buddy that was passing the pipe around, so I figured why the hell not. Before you knew it I was strung out and hanging out in a rather seedy part of town at a local crack house. While I was there I met the most delightful and wise crack whore who offered to take me out to lunch.
I was a little nervous about eating anywhere around our locale. I was hungry and out of sorts, so I took one for the team and forced down some zucchini blossoms stuffed with goat cheese and pork belly sliders; washing the whole thing down with a couple of glasses of Chard - oh the shame.
The worst part about stressing over where to get your next fix was I didn't have the time to make my niece a unicorn cake for her birthday that she wanted. I had been thrown off the Favorite Auntie List; which led to me needing the drugs even more.
I finally hit rock bottom when I woke up on the golf course wearing only a pair of camouflage Converses and an Ozzy Osbourne tee-shirt (don't even ask). I peered up and saw a unicorn dancing around me with a rainbow Hermes scarf on. That's when I decided I'm just gonna say, "No" to crack. I dragged my ass back in the kitchen and made some Rainbow Unicorn Sugar Cookie Pops for my niece, I was desperate for redemption.
The only things you need to make these are my Sugar Cookie recipe and the Royal Icing recipe below. I bought the unicorn cookie cutter at Sur La Table and they carry food coloring and icing tips that you will also need. I forgot to mention you will probably want to set aside a better part of a day, or at least in my case anyways.
1 pound confectioner's sugar
3 tbsp. meringue powder
1/2 teaspoon almond extract
1/2 cup water
Assorted food coloring
Place the meringue powder in a bowl and add a little bit of the water and mix until frothy. Add the confectioner's sugar and extract and start mixing. Slowly add the water and beat until the mixture resembles marshmallow fluff, but a little thinner. You might not need to add all of the water to get the right consistency.
Separate into bowls and add food color.
I like to use this consistency as a dual purpose icing, it's thin enough to pipe on and it spreads out a bit, so you don't have to both outline and fill.
Thank you everyone for your kind comments and emails. I'm just fine, just deeply engrossed in some long overdue projects. I don't think I could get rid of some of you even if I tried. I wanted to share some of my favorite comments and e-mails I received.
Ann from Anncoojournal: I'm sad that I'm going to miss you dearly. Please update once in a while and I promise I'll be the first to leave you a comment.
For the record, I don't keep score and am appreciative of each and every one of you that takes the time to leave me a comment; I know just how precious time is. Besides these days I can't even remember if I fed the dogs' dinner or not. I even resorted to asking them, "Did I feed you"? The bold faced liars had the nerve to shake their heads, "No". Who knows what they will try and get away with next!
Elisabeth from Food and Thrift Finds : "I'm coming to San Francisco for the Foodbuzz Festival and I will hunt you down and find you if you don't attend".
Take it easy Elisabeth, I've secured my ticket and I will be there. I'm still working on my required blogging uniform though. I was envisioning something with neon flashing lights; does anyone think that might be a tad much?
Patty from Patty's Food: "Quit smoking crack and get back to blogging"! Thanks Patty you are the best.
I found my inspiration for these cuties here.