Cauliflower Pizza and I'm probably coming back for yet another life...

I'm sure you've all heard about that little old thing where you have to keep being reincarnated until you get it right here on this earth.  Well I hummed along pretty smoothly for most of my years; I mean there was a little slip up here and there.  For the most part the faux pas were negligible and I figured there was that first 40-year free pass clause anyways.  Most of the details are still a blank and I haven't quite even begun to figure out exactly where things went sideways, but trust me friends this one was bad, really bad.  In the big scheme of things I shouldn't be too upset about it, because I have this sneaking suspicion that this isn't my first rodeo here on earth and what is another 90 years or so added to the sentence.

The worst plans are always hatched out of desperation, and desperate we were.  I shouldn't have gently persuaded (conned) my sister into going along with my evilly delicious plan.  It is practically not my fault that she has not yet learned that going along with my ridiculous ideas could spell trouble.  I'm not blaming her though; actually we've both decided that the blame should rest squarely on Hot Dog Dude. (Besides, he makes it way too easy.)

It started off on such a good note; I was all decked out in my vampire slayer outfit, clutching my dagger ready for any rogue vampires whom might cross my path.  Ready, willing, and able to defend innocence against the dark forces.  Seriously, do I look ready for business or what?

            

What happened next was so heinous I can't even tell you here.  Look I do have a reputation in the community to uphold and why in the heck wasn't someone keeping a closer eye on where that tiny little Doc McStuffins was leaving her hard earned candy loot.  I'm too embarrassed I just can't, well maybe I could if I wrote it into a fictional story and changed the names to protect peoples privacy a little, hmm.  

How about we just change the subject and focus on the important things in life, like the very important fact that Thanksgiving is right around the corner and I haven't even begun to explore what I'm making this year.  I'm going to also completely block out the fact that I signed up to run a 5K the morning of Thanksgiving and then will come home and cook for everyone.  Complete mental blockage, it's a gift; so I suppose I shall have to add that one to the gratitude column.

Quite sometime ago I ran across Cauliflower Pizza recipes and they looked quite tasty, a pizza without carbs, can't go wrong there.  It would be perfect, except I love carbs and I'm much too lazy to cook cauliflower and then arrange it into a fancy pizza shape.  So consider this recipe a gift friends.

Cauliflower Pizza (for the lazy)
1 head cauliflower, cut into florets
1 cup cherry tomatoes, halved
1/4 cup olive oil
1 clove minced garlic
3/4 teaspoon dried oregano
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese

In a small bowl whisk together the olive oil, garlic, oregano, salt, and pepper and toss over the cauliflower and tomatoes.  Place on a baking sheet lined with parchment (because we've already established we are lazy and why on earth would we want extra cleanup chores).  Bake in a preheated 400 degree F oven for 10 minutes. Remove from the oven and sprinkle with the grated parmesan and return to the oven for an addition 5-10 minutes, depending on how soft you like your cauliflower.

Serve warm or cold.

Please don't tell me you thought I'd dropped of the face of the earth.  Didn't we already establish earlier, I have plenty of more years left remaining here; so I may as well entertain myself someway and torment the internet in the process.

Enjoy,

Gina

Pizza Bears

Are the kids being out on summer break driving you stark raving mad yet?  It only took 4 hours to hear those dreaded words "I'm Bored" around here.  I got really behind with work and some other projects and figured summer would be the perfect time to catch up.  Why am I always so delusional, why?

I did get started on a painting I promised my niece and I survived a work audit.  Having everyone home and in my grill 24/7 should be delightful and refreshing, shouldn't it?  Wrong - way wrong, when is summer break over with anyways?

I put a batch of pizza dough in the mixer in the morning and pulled out some coloring books and markers to make the day go a little quicker.  Staring down at the smooth, supple bowl of pizza crust I made an executive decision that this dough wasn't going to be any ordinary old pizza.

Pizza Crust

1 1/2 teaspoons dry active yeast

3/4 cup water, 110 degrees

1 teaspoon salt

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

1 tablespoon olive oil

Also needed:  Pizza sauce, mozzarella cheese, garlic salt, 1 egg + 2 teaspoons water, sliced black olives and roasted red peppers or tomato slices

Add the yeast and water to a large bowl or bowl of a mixer and let proof for 5 minutes.  Once the yeast is a little bit foamy add the salt, flour and olive oil and mix with a dough hook until the dough is starting to climb up the hook.  Or mix by hand and turn out on a floured board and knead by hand for five minutes and return to dough to the bowl.

Cover the dough with a towel and let it rise for an hour or so.

p.s.  If you want go buy some pre-made dough from the store, my lips are zipped.

Place the dough onto a floured cutting board and cut it into four equal pieces.  Cut a big portion for the body, a golf ball sized piece for the head and a small 1-inch strip and cut the strip into 2 legs, 2 arms and 2 ears.

Flatten the body portion and smear the middle with a little pizza sauce and then place a bit of shredded mozzarella cheese on top of that (a couple pieces of pepperoni would be tasty too).

Gather the dough up with your fingers and twist to close.  I like to push the cheese in a bit with my finger while I'm pulling up the edges.  Place the body on a baking sheet lined with a silpat or parchment.  Flatten the body a bit and shape into an oval.  Take the head piece and flatten and insert a bit of cheese and pinch and twist just like the body piece and place it on top of the body on the baking sheet.  Roll the legs, arms and ears into small balls with your hands and place them next to the body.

Make all 4 bears and cover them with a clean dish towel and let rise for 40 minutes.

Beat the egg and water together and brush over the bears.  Sprinkle the bears with garlic salt and place two black olives for eyes and a strip of roasted red bell pepper for the mouth.

Bake in a 425 degree F oven for 18-22 minutes until nicely browned.

Serve with a bowl of pizza sauce and grated Parmesan cheese for dipping.

Hopefully these cute little bears will put a smile back on your face, because let’s face it you know you missed me while I was on my little break.  I missed all of you, sniff - sniff.

Enjoy,

Gina

Meatloaf and Mashed Potato Calzone - Hot Dog Dude's Fantasy Lunch Realized

I learned a long time ago, that there are really only a few things in this world that Hot Dog Dude needs to be content.  One of those things is meatloaf and mashed potatoes with some cheese thrown in for good measure.

I have also accepted that in general we live on different food planets.  One night we were watching a commercial for some fast food joint and they were advertising a bowl with meat, mashed potatoes and cheese on top of that.  May have even been something in there resembling a vegetable, but that is sketchy.  I looked at him and said, "Who in the heck would want that?" (Dumb of me, I know).  He looked at me like I had just thrown out his favorite tee-shirt from High School.  (For the record; I'm still denying that one).  "I would", he grimaced.

In that moment I saw Hot Dog Dude in a whole new light.  Could it be true, was this what his inner most food fantasies were made of?

Meatloaf and Mashed Potato Calzone

2 pounds pizza dough 

1/2 pound leftover meatloaf

2 cups mashed potatoes

1 small container pizza sauce

2 cups mixed shredded cheese

1 egg + 2 teaspoons water, beaten together

1.  Take the pizza dough out of the package and place it onto a cutting board with a little bit of flour on it.  Cut the dough into a total of four pieces and roll each piece out into an 8" or so circle.

Tip:  Leave the dough out on the counter for 15 minutes before trying to roll and it will roll out easier.

2.  Spray two baking sheets with no-stick spray and place the pizza rounds on the pans.  You should be able to fit two per pan.

3.  Spread a generous amount of pizza sauce on each round and break a slice of meatloaf up into chunks and place it on one half of the circle.  Stay about an inch away from the edges.

4.  On top of the meatloaf spoon 1/2 cup or so of the mashed potatoes on top of that.  Sprinkle generously with cheese.   - Use good manly cheese here, not that foo-foo goat cheese stuff we adore.-

5.  Brush the egg wash around the edges of the dough and fold one half over forming a half-circle.  Pinch edges with your fingers.  Pull the bottom edge up of the crust and fold it over pinching even more.

6.  Bake in a 400 degree F oven for 20-25 minutes until your crust is nice and crisp.

Makes 4 calzones.

I made the meatloaf and mashed potatoes the night before, so all I had to do was throw these together at lunch.

Hot Dog Dude devoured his straight off the baking sheet, being the mild mannered lady I am a plate was more in order.

Hot Dog Dude loved these calzones so much; not only did he eat one for lunch, but also he ate the rest for dinner.  If that isn't love, I don't know what is.  

Enjoy,

Gina